All posts by Lifestyle Blog

A genuine spot to encourage all genders in all moments big and small. Shares best tips on goal setting, self-care, traveling & more! Created by Seqouia B, a full-time working mother, while still living her life and doing what she wants & when she wants to! Who loves her freedom and love inspiring others to do so as well.

How to be more successful without stressing

Hello BSL buddies!!

Today i will be sharing how to be more successful without stressing.  It’s going to be a very informal post. I’ve found myself enjoying when i publish these kind of posts where I can be authentic, straight forward and provide good tips to help you all on your journey.

Within these past few months I’ve noticed I have been slightly stressing a lot and getting overwhelmed with succeeding and being impatient with achieving my goals. When you don’t get the recognition you deserve and everything that comes with being a blogger like sponsors, brand deals, and other things in that aspect it becomes very stressful. Although as a blogger i know it takes time and patience, but still at times I have it bad wanting things to happen much quicker. I always ask myself why i just can’t be that boss woman already that I see myself being in my head, be successful and making 24/7 income so I can travel the world. Sounds a little over the top right? 



Sometimes i talk to myself, and honestly i don’t care lol. I honestly feel that if we don’t get the right advice from someone else then we have to be our own motivation, inspiration, and all the above.

I tend to ask myself, Seqouia? Why are you so in the rush? Why do you want everything to be so easy? If it was just that simple we would have more successful people.

Like what Michelle Obama said ” The only way you succeed is by failing”. That is so true. We will fail, and it is totally fine because failing is only a test, and it just helps you figure out what you aren’t doing right and eventually you will prosper in your business. What you should know is that you have to put out quality and informative content to even reach your target audience in order to be relevant.

I am a very hard worker, and i am very determined to continue achieving my goals. I take (brownsugarlifestyle) very serious because i am not using my platform as just an blog, it’s also a brand. I put in the time, the work, the long nights/early morning, the stress, and i always try to make sure i am consistent with my blogs by posting twice a week or once a week, or more. Do i still need to improve and educate myself? Yes! Yes! Yes!


Staying focus should always be your main priority. When you apply the principle you will get better results everyday. When you wake up and getting ready to start work, use that day as a new start. Focus on that particular day instead of having all that confusion. Daily task are important, i always say having a notebook or an daily planner is needed more than people think. 

Believe in yourself. You have to have self confidence to even succeed in anything. You don’t want to think negative all the time, because the outcome will turn out to be exactly how you think. You have to believe in your abilities and what you are capable of. Success is a process and you have to be ready for whatever that comes towards you. Tell your self, okay it’s hard but down the line it will pay off. There will be people that will not believe in your vision and those are the people you don’t need in your inner circle, keep them on the outside. You should be on focus mode everyday of the week, and how ever long it take to make it through out your journey. 

I enjoy giving out these kind of motivational blogs, because I educate myself everyday so I can be wiser and more wiser. All my blogs are to encourage you all that anything is possible and to not let anything stop you! Don’t let the hype discourage you from moving forward, sometimes everything you see on social media isn’t what it’s cooked up to be. Be patient, be consistent, be determined, be wiser. I will always share my journeys, challenges, and my ups and downs because I don’t always want to be just someone to motivate my audience, I want to grow with you all as well. I am still learning and building myself just as much as others, so I’m very opened to share my challenges i have been and going through.

I wish you all nothing but the best in your success, and i hope you all continue to constantly give me a visit. I also hope that my blogs are very helpful and an eye opener as well. 

Feel free to comment, email me, or message me on my social media i am always available :).

       XoXo -SeqouiaB

5 Ways to Orgasm That you may know

I know it is a high percentage of women who have a hard time having a orgasm in sex. It’s becoming more of a topic now days, and men are starting to realize that some of us women are not getting pleasure out of sex really. So I am intrigued now that our culture is finally starting to embrace the female orgasm and acknowledge the fact that women feel, and need pleasure too. But these type of talks are very much needed because it can put more pressure on how to reach an orgasm, whether if they haven’t had one, only know of one way to, or only can have one by themselves.

So for the advancement of your sex life (because we crave a warming erotic & arousing feeling) , here are 5 ways to orgasm that you may or might not know.

1. Talk about sex: Discussing the sex topic outside the bedroom can encourage you towards a healthier sex life. Having these conversations with friends, or just acquaintances is a interesting way to normalize sex and provides a space to ask serial questions and hear about other experiences as well. The more you talk about sex, the more opened you will feel when it’s time to get into it.It’s nothing wrong hearing how others have orgasms, because mayvbe that will open you & your partner mind to spice things up.

2. Fantasize: There are many ways to get the brain stimulating, because sex is physical and mental, so to even feel aroused, sex has to already have been on your mind. Fantasizing can help you discover your sexuality and find multiple ways to feel pleasure, rather than getting caught up in achieving an orgasm and the worrisome performance anxiety. But we are lucky now days because there are plenty of ways to fantasize like, listening to something seductive, watching pornography, reading explicit books, etc. Also, taking the time to gently ease your mind + body into a sexual mental state through sensual activities, and rose pedal baths with candles.

3. Try a list of new things by (researching): If you’re still not climaxing, it might be because you need to try something new. Or if you are doing the samething your definitely missing out on other intense ways on how to climax. You can go on amazon or hit up a sex store and look at variety of sex toys and lube. It is more to our bodies that can stimulate us to orgasm, we just have to figure it out. Try new things whether it’s toys, sex positions, & finding new spots on the body. All for the sake of pleasure, enjoyment, and getting to know your body better. An orgasm will just be the ending goal.

4. Masturbation is the new self-care: Exploring your own pleasure defnitely can be fun. Don’t feel embarrased about it! Mastubating actually has a few good benefits, like changing your mood, or even easing some pain. Making masturbation part of your self-care can help you learn your body with comfort and confidence.

5. Study your flowing juices: Which toy turned you on more? Which position made you climax? Tap into your sexual energy and pay attention on what get your juices flowing and dripping down your thighs. It’s always good to know what turns you on the most. Listening to your body plays a huge part of any kind of sexual activity.

How to find space to express yourself? (For women)

As a woman I get it. Our space should always be confidential. I mean sometimes it’s for our own good. Because exposing too much of our private life might set us up to be either judged or teased. Also, women need space to express ourselves because we can’t always vent to family and friends. And that is ok.

One thing I dislike now is expressing emotions on social media. Social media shouldn’t know your personal emotions. Because that platform isn’t a diary. You shouldn’t never be that opened to let everyone know when you are having any kind of situation or feelings. Good or bad.

It’s a new year to try handling things differently such as being more in tuned with your inner-soul. Trust yourself more. Find your hidden creativity skills.

  1. Acknowledging your emotions: Some of us do not know how to safely express our emotions. Which will make it hard for others to understand you. Emotions can be challenging, because many of us hide them, feel embarrassed, or ashamed of letting people know how we truly feel. But it’s okay to have emotions, it’s okay to get upset, it’s okay to have feelings, we are normal. It happens. Getting closer to your emotions will get you more in touch with who you really are, and will help with reducing so much build up stress.
  2. Journal your feelings: Start keeping track of your emotions by writing your feelings down in a journal. For some people expressing yourself by pen might be a huge relief. Write down how you react when it comes to your emotions and why. This will help you start to become more connected to how you really feel deeply inside, instead of just putting your emotions aside.
  3. Create a collage: Make a collage of all the things that you like or want to do. Like for example, I like to travel. I made a collage of all the places I haven’t been to and using this collage as a manifestation of travel spots I want to visit. Or you can find pictures that resonate with how you feel and what you want to express.
  4. Play music + vibe: Honestly, music can be very therapeutic, and something you can relate to. Listen to some dope artist that you might can relate to. For me I love listening to Jhene Aiko & Tems. Both lovely ladies music brings me so much peace and I can relate to some of their music in so many ways.
  5. Practice coping with your emotions: Exploring your true self and learning to express yourself is not easy at all. But, living authentically, and validating your feelings every time, will give you confidence to be more opened to yourself. Instead of boxing in the emotions or acting out the emotions with hostility this will help you cope.

XoXo Brown Sugar Lifestyle.

How to grow, heal, and take self criticism

I remember when I first got to the point in my life when I realize I am really growing and that no one no longer serves me. And yes, I feared the thought of losing people I felt so close to. But it was just this weird feeling that suddenly just came to me that I couldn’t get rid of. My body, my soul, needed nurturing, healing, growth…. I’ve been isolating myself mentally, it’s like when I am around certain people I go home and feel so drained. That’s when I knew it’s time for change, it’s time for growth…

On the other hand…

It is essential that we never forget who we are and to never fault ourselves. Because we are still learning everyday, we are still growing.

Mistakes will happen, it’s just lessons we have learned. Pave the way to put your soul at peace and stop dwelling on what you can not do. You will never show up to be the “most perfect” person in the world, because it’s no such thing. But we all have some imperfections that could be undesirable to us. What’s done is done, because as long as you love whom you see in the mirror that should always remind you to feel valued.

Me, my self always show empathy to others because I know how it feels to not align with myself, I know how it feels to never feel that nothing is never enough. But I have gotten tired of living in pain and always feeling unpleasant to others. It’s not about anyone, It’s about you. Start choosing you, be self-fish with you.

Take time to acknowledge where your insecurities are coming from, and step back and figure out why are you blaming yourself for things you can’t control. Stop letting the world of hypocrites make you feel like you need to change something about yourself, because remember it’s not about them, it’s about you.

live in alignment and find your true self…. I promise all your worries will go away…. XoXo Seqouia….

How I learned to move on from negative thinking

I am not quite sure if dealing with so much on your plate bothers you or not, but if it does your definitely not alone. I’ve been their before, and man it’s traumatizing. First foremost, let’s get into how dramatic I am ha! I have always been a person who always overthinks just about anything. Of course my anxiety plays a part of it, but honestly it’s a lot of my overthinking as well.

When I use to get in certain situations, I would literally get to the point where I just give up. I didn’t even use to try. And not having faith is a huge sign of needing to find self-love.

Sometimes we are battling ourselves, because truthfully we do not know who we are and why things aren’t going how we expect it to. Then we get in the habit of feeling like we are failing all the time. But lets take out time to figure out who we are and why can’t we shake these personal feelings.

Remember we think about situations we put ourselves in either prior or after, so it’s definitely a mind thing. But we have to learn how to over power our minds. Time to turn all negatives into positives aspects.

But… how?

Here are the steps I took to move on from negative thinking:

  1. Cut off all negative people from having easy access to you. Don’t listen to the saying “watch the company you keep” instantly remove them. You know when someone isn’t good for you. Having someone negative around you drains your energy 100%. And also, can run other good people away from you.
  2. Turn your negative thinking into positive thinking. Negative thinking is pretty common now days. I’m sure everyone has thought negative before. Maybe not as often, but I know it have occurred at some point. But when that time comes, try replacing those thoughts with positivity. For an example: “I know I need to lose weight, but then again I am still beautiful inside and out.”
  3. Be happy. I know this is the obvious but let’s be realistic, for some people being happy can be a little bit difficult mainly because their upbringing. But honestly, why aren’t you happy? what’s bothering you so much for you to never be in the mood? We let the smallest things make us so annoyed when we really can brush them off. Being happy isn’t hard at all, we make it hard. Find what keeps you in a more happy mood. I am not saying to just smile all day, but really what’s the reason to always be upset for? And this is coming from a person who was always irritable at some point. Being happy attracts the right people, being happy gets things done because you will always be in the mood.

Stay tuned for part 2 ……

3 Ways how to enjoy being alone

We always constantly finding ourselves wanting to have some company around us so we won’t feel alone. But what’s really the real reason why it’s so hard to be alone? Do we you not know how much of a blessing we are but yet we still try to find people to make us feel good?

“ It took me a while to enjoy being alone, but soon as I finally found myself, it has been the biggest gift ever. I love peace more than anything, and the peace that you can give yourself is a blessing. Don’t let anyone stop you from trying new things, you never know what type of creativity skills your inner self has.” -Seqouia 🌞

Today I’m going to share with you, my advice on being alone & how to enjoy it. The relationship you have with yourself is always important and it’s something that nobody can never take away from you. If you deal with this, I advise you to read .

Here 3 ways how to enjoy being alone:


Now to learn how to enjoy being alone is getting to know who you are, just like the process of getting to know someone you met.

So, what do you like about yourself? What makes you so unique from others? What are things you discovered about yourself that you or anyone else didn’t know? What is your biggest obstacles you have faced?

Be true to yourself. Journal whatever that comes quick to your mind. Don’t leave anything out because this is how you learn about who you are.

Work on getting out your comfort zone and try new experiences, have a few conversations, & be a little more expressive.You’re not going to get to know yourself staying cooped up in the same familiar spots. You have to get out there and try new experiences, you will learn what doesn’t catches your interest and what does.


Have you ever had something you really wanted to do but you never did it because every time you ask someone to go with you they always say no or gave you the silent treatment?

So is that how you are going to live your life, not trying new things because you don’t want to go by yourself or because you want someone to do it with you?

Realize that you don’t need anyone to try new things with and do it. And it’s so much in his world to experience. Don’t be the one to hold yourself back. You can also start doing research on things you want to do or things that interest you. Maybe you want to look into writing a book, blogging, joining a yoga class, just anything that comes to mind.


Having self-love is very important, and I’ll always stick to that. We don’t show our selves love & passion like we should, instead we give our love to others. We deserve to love ourselves and be happy with who we are. When you love yourself you don’t care about other people opinions, you don’t let negative comments faze you. So when you master having self-love, you don’t care about anyone’s company. As long as you make yourself feel complete, and you can laugh at your own jokes, you can wear what you want, & you can just be you without trying to impress others.

I really hope these 3 main tips can help.

XoXo Seqouia….

6 Monthly Goals ideas that can help

Monthly goals is a strict way to take care responsibilities & work on your main priorities. We become so ardent about making goals but never end up sticking to them, but if we really want to make change, we must not forget that it is about what we do on a monthly basis. It is about setting important monthly goals, into daily goals that are essential for eternal progress.

Here in this post, I share 6 Monthly Goals ideas that can help

  1. Working on your habits. Having monthly goals will help you improve most habits. Also, will help improve your mental thinking in every aspect. Setting goals for 30 days is a perfect refresher to start working on those habits your tired of having.
  2. Keep your place neat. This is the time to start transitioning on the neater side if you aren’t so tidy. Setting a monthly goal to declutter and organize your place will make things so easy for you. At some point of my life, me & being organized was very much a struggle. I would misplace things and get frustrated, so I had to change that asap.
  3. Stop lounging in bed. When your just sitting in the bed your either on your phone or watching tv, or just being lazy laying there. Of course I admit this was me 100 %. But I started to feel unproductive. Everyone knows once your in the bed and your comfortable, you really don’t want to get up. I started setting a goal to only use my bed for when I’m either going to sleep or taking a quick cat nap.
  4. Exercise 3-5 days a week for a month. Exercising is good for your overall health. I know for some it’s hard getting in the habit of exercising but I promise once you make exercising a goal & you stay consistent, you will never want to give up again.
  5. Social media detoxing. I know, for some it’s tough to do this, especially if your addicted. Set a goal to not use social media for 30 days. Unless you use it for business purposes. If that’s the case, use it strictly for that and sign off.
  6. Nightly self-care routine. Nighttime supposed to be all about relaxing and getting ready for the next day. Set a goal creating a nightly self-care ritual. That makes you feel good before going to sleep. For me, I love taking a bath with no lights just candles, and listening to peaceful music, and after that I make a cup of tea. That keeps me in a really good mood before bed.

XoXo SeqouiaB.

31 positive affirmations for anxiety to help renew your inner peace & serene.

Hey :).

First, I would like to tell you that your going to be okay.

When your feeling anxious, it’s so difficult to speak positive to yourself. Fighting through those negative thoughts isn’t something easy if you’re dealing with having a bad day of anxiety. You may feel like you’re your own attacker. Delivering positive affirmations for anxiety is a great way to shift your mindset so you can move forward.

You want your affirmations to be present, it makes things more authentic. For an example, you may start feeling anxious which possibly will turn into a panic attack. You can utilize your affirmations and speak it loudly to yourself: “This anxious feeling is only temporary.” Or “With each breath i take, I feel more at ease.” Think of these affirmations as helpful tools that will help you overpower your fears of times of need due to stress.

I realized that keeping a list of affirmations in my journal that I have on my phone. Using this app ➡️

Really has been helpful to my daily life when it comes to my anxiety.

I love to write positive thoughts in my journal before the day ends. Especially during moments when I am in panic mode, it’s super useful. I am happy that I have found ways to help with my anxiety, because it’s definitely not a good feeling. It’s very uncomfortable and can ruin a lot of things you want to get done.

Focusing on the positive & doing things that will make me feel better, always keeps me in the high spirits that i will overcome this 100% some day. Here is 31 positive affirmations for anxiety to help renew your inner peace & serene.

  1. I believe in my self.
  2. It’s okay to separate myself for the sake of my mental health.
  3. The anxious feeling is only temporary. 
  4. I will practice inhaling + exhaling and take things slowly.
  5. I am doing the best that I can and will continue to grow daily.
  6. Everything is going to be okay.
  7. I feel grounded and safe.
  8. I will take things one day at a time, and focus on the now.
  9. I am strong I will get through the gloomiest days.
  10. I am loved.
  11. Even if my day is slightly hectic, I can still make the most of it.
  12. I give myself permission to take a mental health day to renew+refresh+recharge.
  13. I don’t have to compete with anyone because I am enough.
  14. I am in control of my mind, body, & soul.
  15. Today, I choose happiness.
  16. I am embrace change, change is good.
  17. Tomorrow is a new day, it’s a new you.
  18. I am capable of anything I set my mind to.
  19. I will build a career, get in shape, & love myself unconditionally.
  20. I am calm, I am at peace.
  21. My anxiety doesn’t define me.
  22. Through all my challenges I still persevere.
  23. I am more than enough.
  24. I let go of toxic & negative thoughts and replace them with positive.
  25. Self-care is important.
  26. It’s okay to say no for my mental health.
  27. I celebrate my wins, even if it’s small.
  28. My feelings are valid.
  29. I am beautiful.
  30. I will live authentically and never stop following my dreams.
  31. With each breath i take, I feel more at ease.

XoXo Seqouia

5 Toxic habits to give up in the morning

Honestly I suffer from insomnia and been dealing with it for a while. So transitioning into being a morning person was definitely a challenge. I can say that I mostly don’t like mornings when I have to get up for work or to handle things super early because I would be sluggish. But now that I am accustomed to mornings, I do realize that the mornings are much productive, healthier, and much easier to maintain your daily lifestyle. When you get up early, you can start your to-do-list off right like, cooking breakfast, running errands, doing laundry, handle things for your business etc. So it’s definitely a good thing being an early bird. But in order for me to get use to this new early bird lifestyle I had to get rid of these 5 toxic morning habits.

Here’s how:

  1. Waking up late: Wake up early so you can get prepared for a much successful day. But make your first hour your self-care time. The first hour after waking up must be specifically for nurturing yourself. Your growth, your happiness and mental health all plays part of fresh start.
  2. Checking social media first thing in the morning: This is an epic fail! I had this problem bad. My phone was the first thing i thought about when i woke up, and i had to fix that issue asap! You must never start your day checking your phone and scrolling through Facebook, Twitter or Instagram. And truthfully this small habit affects our mood and our entire day if you think about it. That’s how much social media has an affect on us. Social media is a big distraction and can have you out here missing out on the importance things of life. When i’m distracted i feel like i have an heavy burdened on me & it’s definitely not a good feeling. Try turning your phone off before bed and not powering it back on.No excuses!
  3. Not getting natural light & fresh air flowing: Get some natural light and air after waking up. We are human beings, so nature is us 100 %. Also, once all the windows are opened and it’s fresh air & light coming into your home, you began to start feeling energized. Wake up & open up!
  4. Not drinking your herbal teas: Drink some good ole organic green tea every morning. Green tea is good for the body. Green tea improves brain function & protects the brain from aging & more.
  5. Not sitting in peace: Stop having morning chats, use your mornings on focusing purely only on you. Having those talks in the am only stall out time then you will look out & your morning has been wasted.

3 Ways To Find Motivation When You Have None


Feeling unmotivated can happen to the best of us and sometimes you get into such a slouchy mood that even thinking about making positive changes to your lifestyle, it seems way too hard. Lack of motivation can be the biggest fumble to achieving your goals. But it’s never too late for change, because there is plenty of motivational tips + techniques that can help you. But be aware that every motivational tip may not help for you like it did for the next. Sometimes what doesn’t help for you can steer you in the direction to something that probably can help. 

Here are 5 ways to help you find motivation when you have none:

1. Get outside with nature

Sitting in the house because you consider yourself a “homebody” can eventually mentally drain you without you actually knowing it’s draining you. Sometimes seeing other humans walking around or seeing the birds fly back & forth, or just viewing the beautiful greenery can be so therapeutic. Don’t get it wrong I have my days where I slip up also because sometimes I rather be no where else but my bed, and also at times I feel like my motivation is very low. Of course it doesn’t last for too long because I have to shake that off eventually. Getting outside in nature and changing your environment can spark your motivation and inspiration 100%!

2. Find your new (favorite)

What’s your favorite thing to do? I had to start doing things I like to do more. Sometimes I forget about making things about myself more often. It’s okay to make your hobby an habit. It’s okay to at least take one day out the week to have some fun. Like my favorite things to do the most is listening to a uplifting + motivating podcast. It keeps my soul at ease. Make your new favorite, your née routine.

3. Brain Dumping 

Having so much on your mind? It’s hard to sleep at night? Your brain feels completely heavy? I definitely get it. Same here. Sometimes we clutter our brains with problems & things that’s not in our control. Can we relieve ourselves from doing so? Of course. What I do when I brain dump is get a note pad, and I write out everything that’s on my mind in order. I light some candles, pour a glass of wine just to get a vibe going, may even play some music. But best believe that pen is going to work. 


XoXo -Seqouia

The benefits of connecting with yourself + nature

The benefits of connecting with yourself + nature


Ever since I’ve been in tuned with myself, things has been a little different. I’ve been connecting with myself & nature. And the benefits of it is amazing, no matter what I go through. Once I mastered on how to focus on myself and to connect with nature, I always notice a drastic change in my life. Some people are shocked on how they see such a different Seqouia, or even how I react to situations now. 

I can literally write a book of all the things I have & currently still going through. But it’s no need for a pity party. My #1 goal is (getting through it) we will run through so many obstacles in our lives especially women, because we have it the hardest mentally & physically. So I always kept that in mind.

But the big question is, what is the benefits of connecting with nature?

*Increases creativity 

*Keeps emotions in control

*Steady stability

*Improves memory

*Increases gratitude 

*Enjoying being out doors

It’s so many ways you can connect with nature such as:

*Taking a walk

*Relaxing by trees (getting that good ole oxygen)

*Find outdoor activities to do in the sun (like painting at the park)

*Meditate outdoors 

*Have outdoor drinks (Wine, tea, or coffee) 

All these might seem a little cringe, but sometimes the simplest things can be a life changer.

It’s a true fact that our body is supposed to have contact with the earth as much as possible. Mother nature is what keeps us going. We can still do things the natural way. Although humans are spoiled because all the things that were created to make life easier for us. 

It’s always room to [ restore – refresh – renew ]

So there you have it. Those are some of the ways you can get outside to ground & connect with nature. Using your creative ways to make space in your day to get outside and have a breather. It takes no time out your day to put yourself first. Your mental health is important. And it’s so many ways to make changes in your life for better.

Xo Xo _Seqouia

3 Ways to practice setting boundaries?

Boundaries are pin  pointed in clear communication. So the more meticulous you are about them, the more likely it will be respected. Of course you will be repetitive at some point, because your learning + growth, but don’t feel the need to get frustrated or even explain the reasoning of setting boundaries. If people can’t respect that you made the choice to be more structured, then they don’t need to be around you.

Here’s 3 ways how to set boundaries that protects your mental, physical, & emotional health.


Let’s be realistic here. It is some people that will misinterpret your choice of words of respecting a boundary because they are unpleasant. Either these people aren’t able to set their own boundaries or they are just used to having nasty behavior towards people for their own gain. And since you will not allow that, they also mistreat you as well. To each it’s own, as long you uphold your own boundaries for your own mental & physical health that’s all that really matters.


Always make sure that you sustain your boundaries at all times. Because no one isn’t going to get things done like yourself. You are the priority, remember that. Think of qualities you have of yourself so you can start learning about you.


The most important step to defining your boundaries is to make them visionary. Boundaries are often confusing and abstract because they feel invisible in our daily lives. By visualizing your boundaries and writing them down, you can get much more clarity on where you want to make things fair & clear between you and other people.

XoXoXo Seqouia B.